When the family comes baby, it seems, the whole world begins to revolve around him.And how could it be otherwise, the lives of young parents is now subject to the execution needs a little family member.For the baby is selfishness - a way to survive in the outside world: loud cries, he proclaims that hungry or wet diapers.The next stage in the development of the baby - the knowledge of the world and the game.And here, too, children's self-interest is appropriate.As the child grows, he begins to realize that their parents can be manipulated - it is important not to miss this moment.
So, when did you start to educate and altruistic egoist instead?
beginnings of adult selfishness begin to germinate at the age of three, in this period the baby becomes aware of his own "I".Until that time, children's selfishness - a natural phenomenon and is absolutely normal.
In large families the problem of child selfishness, usually does not arise.Children become more self-reliant, quickly begin to realize that most of the attention and care of parents rightfully belongs more helpless kids.Show wisdom and patience, it is possible to achieve that, and one child in the family has increased ability to empathize and to do something for others.
Common Mistakes
most common mistake of loving parents - exaggeration of the merits and talents of his beloved child.It is not necessary to extol the child for no reason, it is the shortest way to grow a hundred percent egoist.But the advantages do not need to gloss over: do not skimp on the praise when they deserved, that you will motivate your baby to new achievements.
not deprive the child's own initiative, doing things for him, which he could not handle himself, apart from the fact that such behavior promotes altruism, increased custody of children reduces motivation and zest for life.
negative impact on the moral and ethical principles of the child's situation in which the parents are constantly bribe your child, paying performance of household chores, such as lessons learned and good grades.Such commodity-money relations in the family leads to the fact that the child begins to appreciate is not their achievements, and their cost.The desire to make nice for the parents and hear praise, in this situation is replaced by a desire to receive the cash equivalent of parental approval.In addition to the selfishness that leads to psychological immaturity, decreased initiative and creativity of the child.
In no case should not encourage your child to make "anti-egoistic" behavior, for example, forced to share their toys with other children.Forced to act one way or another under pressure, anyone who is experiencing negative emotions, and unlikely to want to repeat it again.Thus, you'll get just the reverse, negative reaction.
bad example is infectious.If your child watches of selfishness from their parents, it is not surprising if you find it in exactly the same quality.Therefore, trying to eradicate the selfishness in your own child, parents should start with themselves.After communicating with the people around the child, almost a hundred percent of the time pattern of behavior takes over his father and mother.Therefore, the best way to instill in your child altruism - to show it by example.
We get on the road to reform, together
• First, release the child from overprotection.Stop help him in those things that he can do himself.No need to sit with him while doing homework, serve it at the table, clean up after them, and so things. D. Brought up in the child independence, likely parents will be able to avoid the problem of children's selfishness.
• Allow the child to buy their own negative experiences.Let him alone to decide for yourself and feel the consequences.For example, I have not learned the lessons - got an F - stayed home to do, instead of playing with friends.However, before you allow your child to make a mistake, be sure to warn about the possible consequences and risks.The lesson the child will remember for a long time, unlike the imposed opinions.
• Begin to teach a child to help around the house.In addition to self-service, let the baby get used to do something useful for everyone.
• Encourage your child when he is happy not only for its success but also the success of friends.Encourage him positively estimate someone's achievements.
• sincerely grateful to the child when he makes a noble deeds, for example, is divided into anything.Feeling the heat in response to its actions, the kid will remember the positive emotions of his action and will strive to get them back.
• awakens altruism baby!The principle of "like cures like" may work in a situation with a little selfish.Properly prompting the opposite quality, you will certainly be able to ease the formation of undesirable quality.
such dangerous extremes
Raising a child altruism, it is important not to go too far.Do not go to extremes - and selfishness, and altruism must be present in equal proportions for the harmonious development of personality.You must be wise to keep a balance and not to grow up in a child pure altruist who lives for others and totally indifferent to their own interests.Kindness these people will not fail to take advantage of the possibility of surrounding selfish.A tendency to sacrifice even a little-assisted in achieving their goals.
Therefore, nurturing a child compassion, mercy, and the ability to give, try to find a middle ground, suggesting a son or daughter in addition to respect for others, self-respect, commitment and ambition.Certainly, altruism - the quality is good, but not to the detriment of its own interests, desires and dreams.
Articles Source: resnichka.ru
