The mystery of adoption: Keep or store?

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theme of adoption is now on the lips of many.After Vladimir Putin signed a decree to ban the adoption of Russian children by US citizens, the problem of orphaned children again came to the fore.But when it is discussing a matter of concern is another problem - the confidentiality of adoption.The issue is so intimate and delicate that is still trying to talk about it in a low voice.

confidentiality of adoption was the subject of many films and TV series: almost every second "soap opera" heroes learn about their origins, as adults.Usually in the movies all the ends happy ending, but the intrigue is kept until the end of the film.But what about in real life?Lee says the adopted child about his biological parents?If you say when?And how to choose the right words and phrases?

have adoptive parents have a lot of fears about it.What if the child wants to find biological parents and leave them?Do not have a child's sense that it deceived for a long time?Therefore, some couples are trying to postpone delicate conversation to the last.Sometimes, as long as some "good" in the backyard aunt does not inform the child an interesting "news".

Mystery creates many problems for the lives of people who have taken a noble decision to take a fatherless family.Firstly, parents try to limit its old contacts to someone you do not accidentally slip.Some even change their place of residence and stop communicating with relatives and friends.Secondly, when it is necessary to collect certificates or documents still have to say that the child is adopted.In such circumstances, parents have anxiety, which is comparable with anxiety fugitive criminal.

fears of many parents because the child can leave or will treat them badly, in vain.Many American psychologists advise to tell the child about his origin as soon as possible.Then you can avoid complicated and awkward moment "grand" sound news.

At a certain age all interested in the question: "And where are the children?" This is the best time to explain everything, and the child will gradually realize that fact.

One mother told a story.Her child knew that he adopted.Once in the courtyard of a boy he wanted to insult him and said that he was not home.The answer was worthy, "But you came out of the belly, and I'm from a big loving heart."

Adolescence - not the best age for such revelations.Sooner or later, there is a desire to see the very first pictures from the hospital, where the family is not.If parents refuse to discuss issues of concern to the child, it is the problem alone, and still trying to get to the truth.Teenagers perceive the world in a special way, forgive cheating adults with difficulty, and in the future, too, begin to lie.Such psychological trauma can affect the state of mind in the future.

Many adoptive parents worry about what the neighbors might say, colleagues, friends.But statistics show that more than 70% of people respect those who decided to adopt, and admire their act.

problem of the confidentiality of adoption - a complicated question, you can not always find the right answers.When a child is born in the family, all around happy and congratulate the parents with the completion.Why not do the same, if the family appears foster child?

Articles Source: shkolazhizni.ru