About Women

scrap of conversation between the two women:

- You know, Mary, you and I are different situations: your losing weight, if it is not fed, and my gain weight if his feed.And believe me, it's not the same thing!

***

Muscovite Glamour comes to stay in the village to the grandmother.

- Babul, where you can go there at night?

- in the bucket.

***

- Alla, Sveta, you Che doing now?

- Why, my boyfriend asked him to make beef stroganoff ...

- Lord!And it is still that of perversion?

***

- Daughter, you FIVE spoons of sugar put - that you, in love ?!

- No, Mom, I just love the sweet tea ...

- You're five tablespoons of sugar put!

- I really love the sweet tea ...

- Daughter, you put them in the soup ...

***

first made epilation.

After it became clear that I have a very crooked legs.

What will advise?

***

Daughter (curious):

- Mom!And where are inserted tampons?

Mom (choking on an apple):

- Well ... how do you say ... well there, where babies come from.

Daughter (ofigev):

buy instagram followers

- The stork, or what? !!

***

I have a bad habit - when sewed up that thread, I stick the needle next to him in bed, so as not to lose.So, today, at 6 o'clock in the morning, before work sewing up a skirt, I did not have time to figure out that I was sitting on an inflatable bed ...

***

Two friends in a crowded subway:

- Damn, what a crush!

- Strange, yesterday in a disco atmosphere, you called it.

***

read in the newspaper that the pregnancy symptoms - drowsiness, confusion, lack of balance ... to conclude that I was about three years as a child.

***

Lonely lady acquainted with an elderly, unintelligent, unrestrained and financially needy person, having all the bad habits, to create a family for his neighbor.

***

Three ladies exchanged the experience.First:

- I got home, her husband becomes attached to the table and half naked in front of him go.

second:

- This is garbage!When I got home, my husband to undress, put on a dog collar, leash, and an hour forcing me to lick his feet.

Third:

- Girls, have you compassionate, I am ashamed of you!Is it so wrong with these animals?So I - I come home, my husband becomes attached to a chair, his mouth sealed with adhesive tape, and two hours to tell him how my day has passed that said Sveta Smirnova and what discount in "World Shoe" !! ..

***

Talk with a pregnant girlfriend:

- Well, are you in your position you want something special?

- Of course!Every morning wildly husband wants to pour into the food diuretic, emetic and sleeping pills to understand bastard like me crappy!

Articles Source: RUNET