guys and yesterday I still Lenka kissed! ..
- done!Well, if not luck, "I am not drink, I'm teetotal."

All that we do not have time to finish, we did not finish it for descendants.

first class courses plumbers begin with the phrase: "Forget everything you learned porn, our profession is much more interesting."

Attention!Dear employees coming to work a bit later, stay on the right side of the corridor, which would not have to deal with employees leaving a little early!

comes two friends in a cafe, stand in a queue.One takes a coin one ruble, throws it up and catches the teeth.The situation is repeated several times until the "magician" did not have time to squeeze in time to the teeth and swallows a coin, becoming blue and starting to choke.While his friend panics and yells for help, unobtrusive and modest little man, who was sitting at a table, quietly puts her a newspaper, slowly coming to the dying, grabs him by the scrotum and squeezes it with all his strength until the coin itself is not emitted from the mouth of the victim.

Muzhichok, saying nothing, catches a coin, and gave a friend of the victim.Then, again without words, quietly returned to his table.Struck by a friend came by a suitable thank peasant:
- Thank you very much, my friend, your life is required.Tell me, where do you work?Do you happen to doctor by profession?
- God forbid, of course not!I'm from tax police ...

husband came home on March 8, drunk and with flowers.His wife opened the door:
- And what am I going to push the legs!
- A vase that we have not?

She wrote sms to her husband: It is necessary to cook dinner, you go to work - buy a chicken.Dinner together.He
to her: Good.
After a while she comes to phone sms from him kiss.She
- shocked, 8 years of marriage, the passion has passed, and now these words ...
writes his answer: Honey, I love you too, and gently kiss.
He calls back: Mary, asking a whole chicken to take?

- Vasya, how are you?
- Why, unwell, Masha ... The doctors prescribed treatment: three times a day
prick ...
- And who is Nick ?!

Bar.Polusumrak.Quietly working TV.There is a listing of female linings:
- These are the only pads that breathe!
A man (barely looking up from the glass):
- How do they breathe, what poor? ..