Here are eight of wrong methods of education, which is guaranteed to lead to the fact that your child will suffer from depression, anxiety, anger, tensions within the family, problems with friends, low self-esteem, feelings that he did, something mustand chronic emotional problems throughout his life.
1. Completely ignore or downplay the importance of feelings of your children
If your children will express their sadness, anger or fear, and you will scoff at them, humiliate them, to ignore or tease, thus you will reduce the importance oftheir feelings.This will, in fact, tell them that what they feel is wrong.When parents do so, they deny their children in love and miss an opportunity to show them that they are loved unconditionally.
2. Use conflicting rules
If you never talk about what to expect from the child, keep it completely in the dark about how to behave in general.Children can either meet or do not meet your expectations.Rules will point them in the framework of the principles and behaviors that will help them determine who they are, good and bad.If you keep your children in ignorance and uncertainty, they will pretend to find yourself, which will lead to low self-esteem and problem behavior.
3. Make your child's best friend
never told about all of your worries, fears and concerns with respect to your children and never ask their advice.If your actions are awkward and do not disappoint your children, they will never learn to respect you and will treat you as an equal or as a flawed, because you used them as assistants.You have to show your children that you can do to cope with their problems, to solve difficult problems and overcome stressful situations and to express themselves in different ways.Be yourself, do to deal with their feelings and do not burden their children.
4. alienates the child from the wife of
If you never show affection and love for your partner / spouse in front of your child, he will not understand what love is or what it looks like.If you always break off in mid-sentence, and the wife push him / her away from him, threatening to get a divorce, you hereby invoke your child has a chronic state of anxiety.If you are already divorced and remain cold, distant, bitter, angry, and constantly find fault with your former spouse, you, without even noticing, give your child understand that your ex-spouse is the cause of the divorce, and that is why you should be more beloved parent inhis eyes.This is called alienation from a parent.
5. Punishing for independence and the desire to live separately
When we punish our children for what they just get older, we make them feel guilty for what they have normal needs and desires.This often causes severe insecurity, defiance, blatant disregard for other behaviors that indicate that a child can not develop, be yourself and be an independent person.
6. treat their children as an extension of themselves
If you, as a parent, connect your own image and self-esteem with the advent of children, their actions, behavior, academic performance and the number of their friends, you let them know thatthey are loved not for who they are, but for how well they fulfill their role and how well allow you to look.It turns them into saints, but not in the title, and they will always worry about being good enough for you.
7. Intervene in your child's attitude
control every action of your children, including their personal relationships (such as with friends, and teachers) hinders their development.For example, if your child is in school, gets into some trouble, and you will immediately rush to talk to the teacher to solve the problem, or you are constantly teach children about how to make friends, the child he / she will never learn on their own to cope with the complextasks.
8. Excessive guardianship
When we protect our children from any problems and emotions, this leads to the fact that they take care of this for granted and have an inflated self-esteem, which often spills over into the real narcissism.They think that life is a lot easier than it actually is.They want everything to take care of them no matter how they behaved.Then, these children become depressed and feel confused when you do not get what they deserve (in their view).
Articles Source: vospitaj.com