who they are, people in white coats?
therapist .It is not a medical doctor, is the manager.He has no idea how to treat you, but it can tell you who knows it.If you know who knows it.But not the fact that someone he knows, knows how to treat you.In general, despite the fact that medicine has leaped forward, the hope is still only in God, which, as is well known, abolished in 1917.
surgeon .The surgeon how he sapper.Wrong only once.True if the sapper errs only once in his life, the surgeon makes a mistake once in your life.Even after the error of the surgeon you have managed to save a life, believe me, it's so you do not need to hell.As a sapper, the surgeon is guided not by the accumulated information and intuition.And this is our happiness, as in medicine intuition is still much safer
Otolaryngologist .These doctors obvious inferiority complex.At first they were called uhogorlonosami.But they seemed frivolous.Then they were called ENT doctor.But this was not enough for them.Now they have teamed up with speech therapists, speech therapists because without the help of people to say they can not be renamed.And, frankly, not very much and want.The most significant help from these doctors, it's when you finally, without a hearing aid will be able to hear from the first title of his profession.It is necessary to you?
Dentist .Sometimes, to not recognize them immediately, they call themselves dentists.The worst doctors.One happiness, the amount of communication with them, the average person is limited to 32 visits.And for those who have no wisdom teeth, 28 visits.But smart people have always said that life is much easier fools (12.5%).So decide for yourself.
Optometrist .This, too, was not enough and they began to call themselves by ophthalmologists.People are extremely unpleasant, because we always want you to see something that your eyes would not look.
gynecologist .Most doctors are disadvantaged because they have half the patients than other Aesculapius.Interestingly, among gynecologists are almost no men.Since everything is strictly gynecology - either you're a man or a gynecologist.Try 61,320 hours a year to look at the most interesting part of the body of women, and I guarantee you, you will quickly lose interest in them.It is impossible to turn a hobby into a profession.
Obstetrician .The most respected medical doctor.That he employs all the other doctors.
Venereologist .The only physician, a meeting which is associated at least with something pleasant.Yeah ... For example, with pleasant memories.This is the most honest doctor.He's the only one you pay for the pleasure, despite the fact that it is a pleasure to deliver to you not him.
Neurologist .Theoretically it can cure everything, except syphilis and fractures, as all diseases of the nerves.In practice, absolutely useless.He can tell you, "Do not be nervous," but just as you have no idea how to achieve this.
Allergist .The most proactive doctor.It is absolutely certain (and it should be noted, he has good reason) that all inhabitants of this planet are its patients.Therefore, the main goal in life allergist - is to find your allergies, as long as you do not run away from it.
psychiatrist .And that, consequently, the most propassivny doctor.In contrast to the allergist, he only vaguely realizes that all the inhabitants of this planet are his patients, and does not want to look the truth in the face.Benefit from it too little.Tell me, how can the patient to help another patient?Interestingly, there are therapists, but psychosurgeons have not appeared.
Resuscitator .Most envious doctor.He simply can not allow you to be happy at the time, until he is forced to remain in this shitty world.
psychiatrist .No, I'm lying.Here they are just very envious, because they want to deprive a person of the last joy in life.
Sexologist .May God grant you never know of its existence.
Sexologist .This is the bright side sexologist.Sexologist tells you that you have bad.Sexologist talks about how you make it even better.The eternal theme of the struggle of light and hopelessness.
Dermatologist .Should not laugh.Despite the dissonant very necessary, although it is very unfortunate doctor.I wonder who live under your toilet rim and other hard to reach areas?No?And each of the reptile, he must know in person!
proctologist .Despite the fact that medicine has leaped forward, these doctors have been, and remain in the ass.
anesthesiologist .Very useful doctor.He does so that you do not feel.And if he makes a mistake - it's even better.In this case, you have nothing else will feel.
gastroenterologist and nutritionist .Absolutely useless product progress.Until the mid XX century, they quite successfully replaced Solovki, Vorkuta, Sakhalin and other places of natural treatment.
Immunologist .Laziest doctor.He's always trying to shift its work on your body.
Pulmonologist .The only doctor who does not share his colleagues misconception that if you quit smoking, the disease will be all by themselves.
Urologist .A doctor with a very narrow-minded.In contrast to the sexologist and sex therapist examines your manhood solely in terms of its adverse features.
Cardiologist .Completely devoid of romantic feelings.Only he had the word "heart, you do not want to rest" do not cause positive emotions.
Trauma .These doctors are very fond of sports.Almost all of its forms, except for chess.
Pharmacologist .If the majority of the doctors involved in order to remove the excess from the body, the pharmacology contrary trying to push it all and more.And then watch with interest how the body will react to a mockery.
Toxicologist .Thanks pharmacologists that the doctor will never be without work.At least, at the moment of Pharmacology provide his work of more than 50%.
Virologist .Very sociable doctor.That he fell to a rare happiness almost every day to expand your circle of contacts.
Epidemiologist .The same virologist, but megalomaniac.
Pediatrician .It is very cruel people.If all doctors take out the rest of us already in the age of reason, then pediatricians are willing to deprive us of the most beautiful days of our lives - our childhood.
Podiatrist .Eliminates the effects of bullying man over his own body.If a pediatrician takes an interest in us from the moment of birth, in the hands of a podiatrist, we usually find ourselves immediately after entering school.In this regard, orthopedists working closely with the Ministry of Education.
rheumatologist .The most innocuous doctor.Usually, it comes to you when you have to sand pours and you already care about the consequences of his treatment.
Radiologist .These doctors are perfectly arranged.First, they study your x-rays.Then study the negative consequences of its previous study.Radiologist in principle can learn many interesting things about you, if he suddenly appears a desire to enjoy the fruits of their labor.
Somnology .What, you never heard of?And for good reason.These doctors are ready to encroach on the most sacred thing we have - a dream.The purely theoretical - a very useful and even universal branch of medicine.Only a sleep guessed that sometimes enough to cure a person from snoring, insomnia to save all those around him.But here's how to cure this one, they have not yet figured out.
Physiotherapist .I think it's just a sadist.He somehow convinced that if you have a good recoil shock, you will be much easier.Apparently as a child the doctors liked to poke fingers in the socket, and now believe that all the others have to go through the torment that once they have experienced.
Emetolog .And you thought it all so prostos night and get drunk well all night hugging the toilet.And here and there.Emetolog scientifically knows from what you feel sick.Even if your sick of him.
Endoscopist .It does not feed honey, let me poke you any crap, the appointment of which is sometimes unknown to him.However, the method is quite effective.The body often with the endoscope itself spewing out all that the endoscopist from him and tried to get.
medical examiner .The only doctor who does not even try to pretend that he is someone treats.
pathologist .The most highly of all doctors.Only he knows exactly what and why you hurt.
Articles Source: RUNET
