11 exercises that will help future parents to avoid unpleasant surprises in the future.
1. Women.To prepare for the completeness, wear free dress and tie on her stomach pouch that you need to wear for 9 months, and every month to weight 2 kg.After 9 months remove the bag from the 20% of the recruited 18 kg.
men.To prepare for the joys of fatherhood, agree with accounts at work to your entire salary immediately transferred to the account closest to your home pharmacy.Arriving home, the last time lie on the couch and read a newspaper.
2. Before you acquire offspring, find a couple who already have children, and tell her comments about how they teach their child to order, as well as the fact that they behave with a child too nervous.
Tell them that they should be patient.Give them tips on how much it is necessary to put your child to sleep, how to teach him to wash in the morning and brush your teeth, teach him how to behave at the table, in general, how to educate him.
Use case: this is the last time in your life when you know all the answers.
3. To find out how your night will be held from 17 to 22 hours, go around the room from corner to corner, holding a bundle of wet weight of about 5 kg.At 22 hours, place the bundle, get the alarm for midnight and go to sleep.At midnight, get up, take the bundle again and walk with him back and forth until the morning.Get Service for 3 hours.Since the sleep you do not succeed, get up out of bed at 2:00, go to the kitchen for a glass of white martini (for example) at 2:45 and go to bed again.At 3:00 still wake up and go up to 4 hours.Set the alarm for 5 hours.Stand on a call, and prepare your own breakfast.Repeat this exercise every day for a year (preferably two).
4. Will you be able to endure the mess that can mess things up a little kid?
Now spread jam, chocolate and yogurt gradually each item of upholstered furniture.
Put little pieces of food (your choice) for the TV and drawers, and leave them there for a few months.Stain your hands and wipe them on the carpet.Then, you try to hide the stained, paint them with colored pencils.
5. Dress the baby is not so easy as it seems.Catch an octopus in the sea and try to push it in a plastic bag so that none of the tentacles are not leaned out of the package.Ha the exercise given the whole morning.
6. Take a pack of pasta and a plate measuring about 40x40 cm. Hakleyte pasta on a plate in a circle, cover them with varnish and paint plank black.To the back of the plank fasteners to attach and hang it on the wall.Let these beautiful "necklace as a gift my mother on March 8" hanging five years.
7. Buy a chocolate ice cream and place it in the glove compartment of your car.Stick a few coins in the cassette radio.Crush a few chocolate candies in the back seat, share it metal spatula.
8. Preparation for the days when you are ready to go anywhere with the whole family.Get ready to leave the house.Half an hour wait at the door to the bathroom, then go to the front door.Get out.Wait five minutes for the door.Again sign.Again exit.Again sign.Again exit.Start the car.Hervno press on the gas pedal.Signalte.Stop the engine.Get out.If you smoke, smoke your cigarette tenth.If not - biting his nails.Ha feet.Walk up to the front door for a minute, press the call button.Shouts: "Well soon you there ???" Go outside, walk 5-10 minutes.Sit in the car.Once again sound the horn.Turn on the radio.With this aspect you have read in full.
9. Repeat each phrase said to you five times, occasionally adding, "What did I say?".
10. To learn how to feed a baby, ask your wife to help you.Let it repeats: "This spoon - for the pope." Ask her to bring the spoon to your mouth, and do at this time play the airplane (with the help of the lips imitate the engine noise).When the spoon is your mouth, shaking his head (as if to say "no") and start bawling.If she insists, take a spoon in his mouth, then spit out the whole soup.Continue to spit, not forgetting to roar.Pee in your pants is welcome.
11. Learn the song "In the grass grasshopper sat".If you continue to sing it even at work - then you are finally mature enough to become a real parent.
Articles Source: bayanov.net
