How to learn to avoid the vagaries of children?Is it possible to negotiate with a child who has not yet said?
All parents want their children to be obedient.But to avoid the vagaries of children no one can.Kid still can not speak, but to defend its interests with the help of crying.Can we do without tears and agree with your child?Experienced mothers and psychologists have mastered the language of diplomacy, even with toddler.
We all communicate in different ways.Some undecideds by nature and expressed only when necessary, others talk incessantly.Different styles of communication we use with children.And the children are copying us.Learn to communicate, negotiate, conflict and out of the conflict.We, the parents, their first and main teacher in the field of communication.It is therefore important to present them only good lessons.
Learning to understand without words
As soon as the baby begins to understand speech (8-9 months), he manifested the need to engage in dialogue with others.However unformed speech apparatus does not allow him to express what he wants.The child is misunderstood, upset and crying.Meanwhile, to teach him to communicate without words by the forces of each parent.Emotionally bright, rich gestures, it will be an example of communication of the adult to the child.Scarce learn not only to understand but also to respond to parents using gestures, begin to conduct their lives in the first dialogue with them.
child can be purposefully teach just a few gestures (give, take, another, drink, eat, yes, no), and it has greatly facilitate this communication.He will understand the answer to his request.He will be happy about it and extremely proud of himself.This will only strengthen his confidence in themselves and in their abilities.
The benefits of gestures in the development of young children is written book kaliforoniyskih scientists - PhD Linda Acredolo and Susan Goodwin "How to Talk with your child when he is not yet able to speak."Long-term studies of these authors show that gestures not only to improve communication with young children, but also stimulate the development of their speech.And is not a reason to begin to teach your baby gestures as early as possible?Moreover, the results exceed all expectations.
conversation on equal
How to talk with your child after a year?Children's nursery rhymes, funny poems by which parents communicate with babies, toddler maturing not attract.He is interesting to listen to "serious" conversations parents and sometimes participate in them.
with kids really need to talk on equal terms.If he does not understand something, just stop to listen to you.Attention at this age children still absently.Therefore, yet try not to complicate the talks with his young companion length of the structure.No need to chattering, or vice versa speak too slowly and monotonously.Speak correct Russian, rich and expressive.
course, to go to extremes and constantly monitor their speech is not worth it.Most importantly, your dialogue (or monologue while only) place.For a child who is learning to speak, it is important to communicate as such.Unfortunately, not all parents give this value.Their toddler already knows how to walk, I can play a long time, and mom and dad that and excited about their business, communicate with each other and the child watch from the sidelines.And then they wonder why their baby is 2 or even 3 years still have not said, and does not know how to listen.
first basics of diplomacy
But here we come to the most interesting.How to negotiate with a child who can not speak?After all, you do not want the child, who away from the game and led to wash their hands, crying.And it would be great to teach your daughter to collect toys, sit on their hands when her dress, and already learning to dress herself.We offer the following tips.
to agree on something with your child the first and second year of life, it turns out, it is not so difficult.The easiest and most effective way - to make the communication element of the game.Call it the first rule of diplomacy.Just wash boring, but watch as the soap foam, slips and falls out of the small palms, fun and interesting.And, you can compare one hand cleaner, the baby or mother?This is not just a game, and developmental activities for the benefit of business!
just so reluctant to collect toys, but to send the bear to sleep in a box, and take back the cubes on the truck in the garage much more interesting!Pofantaziruet, how else can inspire a child "boring" business, and he would be happy to participate in them.
With an older child it is possible to agree on the words."Let's you and I swill handle, and then honor your favorite book" - we say the child and go together to the sink.When hands are washed, be sure to have a book to read, even if you think that the baby is already forgot about it.In children older than one year have a good memory.They have enlisted your promises, and patiently waiting for you to follow them.Being cheated, they simply will not believe you next time and will not agree to your entreaties.Be honest - the second rule of diplomatic communication with children.
Well, the easiest way (by the way, often used by parents) - shift the focus of the child, to distract him talk.How to reassure capricious?Tell him the fascinating story of the life and to show what is going on outside the window.In the meantime, he quickly cut nails or wear for a walk.In such a manner can be a long time to communicate with the child, avoiding his whims and tears.While it is small, it allows us to manipulate a.So why not use the benefit of these manipulations?
However, all must know when to stop.Constantly "palaver" crumbs and perform any actions without his will, of course, impossible.Even year-old kid is necessary as often as possible to give the right of choice.This will teach him independence and judgment.To begin with ask him to do a very simple choice."That apple and pear! What are you going to?"- Ask the child."But the two books, which will be read?"The child will be happy with finger at this or that subject.And let his choice will not always conscious, but this will be his first lesson on decision-making.
And finally, there is nothing wrong with that if you cheat a little bit and give the child a choice without a choice.Did you go to sleep - now or in five minutes?What botinochek'll wear - right or left?The operation he somehow have.But he would be proud that his opinion is also taken into account.So, usually the third.Lead in communication, but always offer crumbs to make a choice.
Finally.Always remember that you are dealing with a baby, which is much smaller, weaker than you.So always try to reduce this distance.Sit on his heels, grab his hands and looking into his eyes, explain what you want from him.Saying you need calm, even voice.If the child does not listen to you, in any case it is not necessary to switch to a scream.In a raised voice will not negotiate with anyone, especially a child.
Most likely, such a manner of communication will take the child immediately.But if you take it a rule to consider the opinion of his young family member to remain calm and self-confidence, will communicate with the child frequently and on an equal footing, he quickly understand what you want from him.And do not believe it: feel older.Then the vagaries will be less.And your young diplomat will delight you with their obedience.
Articles Source: ourbaby.ru
