I'm sure many have encountered the phenomenon as a "dislike" at first sight.That is, we can literally intersect with a second person look and everything is clear - we do not like.The intensity of this "do not like" is very different - from mild dislike to complete rejection.
And well, if a bad man is not the one with whom you have to communicate.But is that any way to avoid this is impossible.For example, if you came to the family of the husband (wife), lives with his parents and one of them makes you persistent hostility, it is quite clear that the prospects of such a family life may be not the most promising.
Important Disclaimer: Please note that we do not know these people, we do not know what they are, we derive an opinion about them only on the basis of his previous experience.That is what we are those people, to put it mildly, do not accept there is only our imagination that this man is something bad for us.And works on the understanding of what, in fact, the case, it is necessary to us, rather than trying to change the other person.
So, what we can call a rejection of other people?The most likely options are.
once before (most often in childhood) people, like someone who annoys you, you do something to hurt.For example, frightened, threatened, abused.And it was in this form, and so on have affected that left a strong imprint that you are automatically transferred to all similar people.And, most likely, it is not just about the resemblance, and about some details - perhaps the expression of eyes, which you have forgotten, but which is triggered when you see something like that.In fact - this is the result of traumatic events.The peculiarity of the situation lies in the fact that the initial event may be so deeply hidden and forgotten that you even have no idea why this is happening.
When unpleasant man resembles someone from your past, but it is more conscious memory.For example, do you remember how you annoyed his teacher meaningless quibbling and teachings on how to live.It could be your parents, who showed, for example, increased custody of you.Think of a situation where you could say, "she says, just like my mother," and this is often not the most pleasant comparison.
It may be a person who, for whatever grounds is contrary to your basic notions of correctness.For example, if you feel like a "real" man or woman, people whose behavior is contrary to invisible sexual behavior, can cause sustained hostility.In particular, men, whose behavior slip something feminine, or woman, in the behavior of the slip something masculine.An interesting feature of this variant is that the representatives of sexual minorities may cause less irritation than those who like "masked".
And finally, the most interesting point - is when some traits in another person actually present in you.That is, in the other you, in fact, see something of themselves.At the same time, as a rule, the presence of these qualities in yourself you deny.Often it is built on the basis of competition.For example, you believe that you are the light of men.And absolutely do not accept people who are doing the same.Do you think that you shine more correct than they are.
And sometimes envy.For example, you can see how the other person loves himself, caring for themselves, and you, for some reason, do not let yourself ...
Articles Source: shkolazhizni.ru
