When the proper upbringing becomes wrong?


annoying spoiled children who are on the verge of hysterics get their way by selecting the most crowded place.Seeing such a scene in the street, people are horrified: "What a rude kid!But my mother is guilty, would be slapped on the ass, that's all business. "

order in his family did not grow as monsters, parents initially try to eliminate any manifestation of rebellion.

What mistakes parents make in the way of proper education:

Raised Mom

Raised mother knows that the child should not be greedy, arrogant, not offend others.And of course, she was right.But as an adult.Then she makes a mistake to ignore the feelings of their child.

example: "Give him your car, you have enough of it at home."The child feels the same, if, for example, to tell an adult, "Give him your car, you have already dashed off on it."At once there is indignation: "Why should I give if it mine?" It is quite another thing, if the adult and child has a personal impulse to share, and it does not impose or force to do it.It is believed that the feelings of the adult - this is serious, but not necessarily respect the children, and you can still catch up to condemn, "You greedy, bad."

Council. You have to be attentive to the feelings of the child.Be sensitive to understand that he feels and know when he needs support.

desire to learn to respect their parents

Every parent wants the child to be obedient and respected him.Therefore, when the kid behind the development of the calendar (late starts to walk, talk), adults begin to look for an answer to the question: "What's wrong baby?After all, the baby will develop acquaintances and better trained. "

More parents are beginning to fear that the child will learn in school is bad;that teens get into bad company or a negative effect, and when he grows up - be rude parents.

And that this did not happen in the future, the parents of a child starting to train a child, driving his head: "Parents must be respected and they need to obey."

Adults say, "You have to respect me," forgetting that respect should be grafted in a natural way, without pressure.But often the "must respect" turns into violence, where parents are unconditional power demand respect and obedience.Many adults and this is not enough, they begin to demand gratitude: "I have so much to do, and where the results?Where is your gratitude? ยป

unnoticed desire to cultivate an obedient and respectful adult child moves into violence over him, where the parents of the child requires the complete subordination of all, under the guise of:" I wish for you nothing but good. "

Council. can not get respect in the same way as you can not make love.If you constantly suppress the child will be a revolt, where he decides to get out of power.The result will be rude, quarrel or closed, hiding his feelings.

image of good boys and girls

often sits in my head the image of a good child.And by this way will adapt invented and shred his.And when the manifested personality - stubbornness, leadership, research interest, all this gets out, polished to get a "good boy / girl".Begins training at a sample where the breaks little man, taking the rules that he imposed.

Council. personal qualities necessary to take the child to feel its nature.And instead of a good boy / girl is better to raise a unique and harmonious child, not a trained.

Every parent chooses the method of education of his child.But before we declare the child "you must" remember that he owes nothing.Therefore, "you have to" replace the words "you need."Perhaps this would be a step on the path to understanding.Because often, raising children properly, we do not understand their feelings and do not always know what is best for them (as claimed).Teaching children, we are learning from them - to be good parents.

Articles Source: shkolazhizni.ru