Unfortunately, people do not always manage to peacefully resolve all disputes and misunderstandings.It is often quite out of nowhere there is interpersonal conflict.What is the reason and why this happens?What are the ways of resolving interpersonal conflicts?Can we avoid them and live life with anyone without interfering?
What is conflict?
conflict - is one way to solve the problems and contradictions that arise from the interaction between individuals or groups of people.He is accompanied by negative emotions and behavior beyond the norms accepted in society.
During the conflict, each party holds and defends the opposite position with respect to each other.None of the opponents are not willing to understand and accept the view of the enemy.The conflicting parties are not only individuals, but also social groups and the state.
Interpersonal conflict and its features
If the interests and goals of two or more people in a specific case disagree, and each side is trying to resolve a dispute in their favor, there is interpersonal conflict.An example of such a situation - a quarrel between husband and wife, parent and child, subordinates and superiors.This type of conflict is the most common and most often the case.
Interpersonal conflict can occur between the familiar and constantly communicate people, and between those who see each other for the first time.In this relationship investigated opponents face to face, by personal dispute or discussion.
Stages interpersonal conflict
conflict is not just a dispute between two parties, arising spontaneously and unexpectedly.It consists of several stages of the process gradually developing and gaining strength.Reasons interpersonal conflicts sometimes can accumulate quite a long time before spill over into open confrontation.
At the first stage the conflict is hidden.At this time the only mature and form conflicting interests and views.In this conflict, both parties believe that their problem can be solved through negotiations and discussions.
In the second stage of the conflict parties are aware that peaceful means to overcome their differences did not succeed.There is a so-called tension that grows and gains strength.
The third stage is characterized by the beginning of active operations: disputes, threats, insults, spread negative information about the enemy, the search for allies and associates.This builds up between the parties mutual dislike, hatred, anger.
fourth stage - the process of resolving interpersonal conflicts.He could end reconciliation of the parties or the rupture of relations.
Types of interpersonal conflicts
There are many classifications of interpersonal conflicts.They are divided according to the severity and duration of flow, scale, form of manifestation, the alleged consequences.The most common types of interpersonal conflicts differ in their causes.
The most common is a conflict of interest.It occurs when people have opposed the plans, objectives, intentions.As an example, such a situation: the two friends can not agree on how to spend your time.The first wants to go to the movies, the other wants to just walk.If none of them does not want to make concessions to the other, and will not agree, you may have a conflict of interest.
The second kind are the value conflicts.They can occur in cases where the participants have different ethical, philosophical and religious views.A prime example of this type of confrontation is the conflict of generations.
role conflict - the third type of interpersonal confrontations.In this case, the usual cause is a violation of ethics and rules.Such conflicts can occur, for example, in an organization when a new employee refuses to accept the established team orders.
reasons interpersonal conflicts
Among the reasons, provoking conflicts in the first place limited resources.This could be, for example, a TV or a computer for the whole family, a certain amount of money on the premiums to be divided among all the employees of the department.In this case, one person can achieve his only at the expense of another.
second cause of conflict is the relationship.This may be related tasks, powers, duties and other resources.For example, in the organization of the project participants may begin to blame each other, if for some reason it was not possible to implement.
differences may provoke a conflict of people for purposes of opinion, in the perception of those or other things in the manner of behavior and communication.In addition, because of the confrontation may become the personal characteristics of the person.
Interpersonal conflicts in the organization
Almost all people spend most of their time at work.In the performance of duties among employees are often disputes and contradictions.Conflicts in interpersonal relationships that occur in organizations that often hamper the company's operations, worsen the overall result.
conflicts in the organization can take place both between employees, occupying the same position, and between subordinates and superiors.The causes of conflicts can be different.This shifting of responsibilities to each other, and the sense of unfair treatment management, and dependence of the result of employees from each other.
provoke a conflict in an organization can not just disagreement over working moments, but also communication problems, personal animosity between colleagues.Most often, the confrontation can be avoided by employees on their own negotiations.Sometimes managing interpersonal conflicts assumes head of the organization, he finds out the reasons and try to resolve the problems.It happens so that it can end the dismissal of one of the conflict.
Interpersonal conflicts spouses
Family life implies a permanent solution to all kinds of everyday problems.Very often, the couple can not find an agreement on certain issues, resulting in an interpersonal conflict.Examples include: the husband came home from work too late, my wife did not have time to cook dinner, spouse scattered around the apartment dirty socks.
significantly exacerbate conflicts financial problems.Many domestic quarrels could be avoided if every family had enough money.My husband does not want to help his wife wash the dishes - buy the dishwasher, there is a dispute for which channel is going to look - it does not matter, let's take one more tv.Unfortunately, not everyone can afford that.
Each family chooses its strategy of resolution of interpersonal conflicts.Someone quickly gives way to reconciliation and goes, some may live a long time in a state of strife and not to talk to each other.It is important that the discontent is not accumulated, the couple found a compromise, and all problems were solved as quickly as possible.
Interpersonal conflicts people of different generations
conflict "Fathers and children" can be seen in the broad and narrow sense.In the first case, it takes place within a single family, the second is projected on society as a whole.This problem has existed at all times, it is not new for our century.
conflict of generations is due to the difference in attitudes, worldview, norms and values of young people and more mature.However, this difference does not necessarily provoke a conflict.The reason is the reluctance of generations of struggle to understand and respect each other's interests.
main features of interpersonal conflicts of generations lies in the fact that they are far more durable and do not develop at some stage.They may die down and periodically flare up again with renewed vigor in the event of a sharp infringement of interests of the parties.
to your family is not affected by the conflict of generations, must constantly show respect and tolerance to each other.Old men should often remember that they were once young and did not want to listen to advice, and young people do not forget that after many years, they have also become older.
it possible to live life, to anyone without interfering?
Few people like the constant swearing and quarrels.Many people dream to live, never with anyone without conflicting.However, in our society it is presently impossible.
from early childhood man in conflict with others.For example, the kids did not share the toy, the child does not listen to their parents.In adolescence is often the first place stands the conflict of generations.
Throughout life we have periodically defend their interests, to prove his innocence.At the same time we can not do without conflict.We are able to only reduce the number of conflicts to a minimum and try not to succumb to provocations and avoid quarrels without good reason.
Rules of behavior in a conflict situation
In the event of conflict, both parties want to resolve it as soon as possible, while achieving their goals and get what you want.How to behave in this situation with dignity to get out of it?
First we need to learn to separate the relationship to the person with whom there was a disagreement, from the problems to be solved.Do not start to insult the opponent to get personal, try to keep a low profile and quiet.Argues all their arguments, try to put yourself in the place of the enemy and offer him up at your place.
If you notice that you start to lose his temper, his companion offer a break to calm down a bit and cool down, and then continue to the showdown.For a speedy solution to the problem need to see a specific goal and focus on the ways to achieve it.It is important to remember that in any conflict situation is first necessary to keep the relationship with the opponent.
way out of the conflict situation
most successful way out of the conflict situation is to find a compromise, the warring parties.In this case, the parties accept a solution acceptable to all parties to the dispute.It does not remain any misunderstandings and miscommunication between conflicting.
However, not all cases it is possible to reach a compromise.Very often the outcome of the conflict is a compulsion.This option is most typical outcome of the conflict, if one of the parties has a dominant position.For example, the head of the forces subordinate to do what you want him or parent tells his child to do as he sees fit.
To prevent conflict, gain strength, you can try to flatten it.In this case, the man accused of anything, agrees with reproaches and complaints, tries to explain the reason for their actions and deeds.Using this technique out of the dispute does not mean that the conflict is understood and realized the error.Just at the moment the accused does not want to come into conflict.
admit their mistakes and remorse is another way of how to resolve interpersonal conflict.An example of such a situation: the child is sorry that did not prepare lessons and got a deuce, and promises to continue to parents with homework.
How to prevent interpersonal conflicts
Every person should always remember that absolutely any argument is better to prevent than to deal with its consequences and build broken relationships.What is the prevention of interpersonal conflicts?
First you need the maximum limit their contact with potentially conflicting human beings.It may be arrogant, aggressive, secretive person.If you completely stop communicating with such people is not possible, try to ignore their provocations and always remain calm.
to prevent conflicts need to learn to negotiate with someone, try to reach out to every person, respect for the opponent, and to articulate their positions.
In what situations should not interfere?
Before you pick a fight, you should think twice if you really need it.Very often, people start to sort things out in cases where it does not make sense.
If your interests are not directly affected, and in the course of a dispute, you will not achieve their goals, most likely, it makes no sense to engage in interpersonal conflict.An example of this situation: in the bus conductor begins to argue with the passenger.Even if you support the position of a dispute, it is not necessary to get involved in their conflict without a good reason.
If you see that the level of your opponent is radically different from yours, make sense to engage in debate and discussion with such people there.You can never prove his innocence stupid man.
Before getting involved in the conflict need to evaluate the pros and cons, consider the consequences it could bring, how to change your relationship with your opponent, and if you want it, how likely is it that during the dispute, you can achieve your goals.Also, great attention should be paid to their emotions at the threat of a quarrel.You may want to apply the tactics of avoiding conflict, cool slightly and carefully consider the situation.