Personal space is a special area that separates us from the outside world.This kind of protective shell that allows you to feel the limits of their identity and protect them.
At first glance, this is a purely animal instinct - to designate their territory and in every way to protect it from invasion.But in others, this need is also present - at the genetic level.And since we are still united and social ties, the private space of a man is not only space-literally, but also social.
their personal space, we always "carry with them" and are very reluctant to let in there uninvited guests.In the late sixties of the last century a new trend - proxemics that examined non-verbal signals, by which people use to communicate their surroundings.
According to this theory, all the personal space of communication can be divided into four main areas, the boundaries of which are determined by the degree of intimacy that exists between people.A basic law of communication can be formulated as follows: the distance between people depends on the proximity between them.
1. Zone intimacy
rapprochement is allowed from 15 to 45 cm. This is the most important area, the boundaries of which are protected by the most zealous.In this area we let only the closest people with whom we are linked or related intimate family relations.This includes people with whom we have established a most intimate emotional contact, or do we just want to establish a similar relationship with them.So when we fully focus on some person while communicating with him, reluctant to move as close as possible to it.
In our crowded world, we are all too often forced to admit in his zone of intimacy of strangers - in public transport, in line at the movie theater or concert hall.At the same time we have a subconscious anxiety due to excessive proximity of others.In fact - it responds to a generic memory that signals a danger, "Beware, this is a stranger."Therefore, to avoid the typical neurosis because of the life in the city and do not cause aggression towards themselves from others, you must follow a few rules: try not to touch the people standing around, not to consider the long strangers, that is not to violate the basic rules of non-verbal communication.
2. Zone personal intimacy
of closest approach in this area is between half a meter and 80 centimeters, that is - within arm's length.In this area, we assume familiar people with whom we do not have special personal relationships.For example, this includes people with whom we communicate at a party, at parties and at public events.
minimum convergence in this area - up to 130 cm. For instance, we communicate with friends, having met them on the street.
3. Area of social contact
of closest approach in this area may be half to two meters, and minimal contact - from two to three and a half meters.This distance allows us to comfortably communicate to solve business problems.These include service contacts (in the store, the post office, etc.), meetings with casual acquaintances at various events.
4. Public distance
This zone exists within the three and a half to five meters away from the person and is a classic distance for communication between a teacher and his pupils, the chief subordinates, teachers and students.
This is something that relates directly to the comfort of the spatial distance relative to the other person.But the concept of personal space may be of purely social in nature and indicate the boundaries of the individual - habits, tastes, personal time, secrets and loneliness.This is especially important when a man and woman meet, live together, to build a family.Very often relationships break up just because one partner becomes "too much", so others have to step aside, to once again feel the boundaries of his personality.
How to maintain personal space in relationships, intimacy and freedom to peacefully coexisted under one roof?Proximity means loyalty to each other, responsibility and a desire to help his partner.A freedom means that in this case?
First, you need some time to carry out separately.For example, it may be time spent on hobbies or personal development.
Secondly, even in a shared apartment, each must have its own area, where you can be alone.
Third, one can not demand from the partner complete openness in all thoughts and events of his life.Personal space is violated by reading other people's letters, digging in the phone, clock control, which is what makes it what to eat and what your partner is thinking at the moment.
person is extremely uncomfortable feeling that it "disappeared" his partner.And in a similar way to "dissolve" is also dangerous because of the elect, and with it himself, to lose at any time for various reasons.Therefore, do not lose yourself and respect the personal space of their loved ones.
